A Hasty Marriage?

"When I met Mary, I thought she was the most beautiful lady I had ever seen, and I immediately fell in love. There was no way I was going to lose this one so, after one or two dates, I asked her to marry me.

Mary said, "But we don't know anything about each other."

I told her, "That's all right, I know that I love you and that's enough for me - if you love me too then we'll just spend lots of time learning about each other as we go along."

So Mary consented, we were married three days later, and we immediately went on a honeymoon to a very nice Hawaiian resort.

On the first morning, we were lying by the pool and I decided to show off a bit. I got up from my towel, climbed the 10 Meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, followed by a three rotation jackknife position, then I straightened out and cut the water like a knife.

After a few more demonstrations, I came back and sat down beside Mary, knowing I had impressed her.

And it worked, because she said," That was incredible! You are a really great athlete"

I felt great! I thanked her and said, "I used to be a Olympic diving champion. You see, I told you we'd learn more about each other as time passed and the surprises are the best part."

Mary laughed and agreed with me. Then after a few minutes, she got up, jumped in the pool, and started doing laps.

I was impressed! After about thirty laps she climbed back out and lay down on her towel and she was hardly out of breath.

I said, "That was incredible Mary! I'm really impressed. Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?"

Mary sort of smiled and said, "No. I was a hooker in Venice and I worked both sides of the canal."

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